it's not humbling, woman.....it's called genetics....

 This is so random but I came across a random vid about this European girl saying that shopping in Korea makes her humble in terms of sizing. She says that she usually wears small in European sizes but in Korea, she has to go with either L or XL. 

Is it just me or are people completely unaware of differences in in our genetics? Europeans are genetically larger.Taller. A lot bigger than Asians. 

It's not about being petit or small or cuter. It's how it is. I typically shop at the kids section when shopping at European clothing store. Their small sizes are still too big for me. My jeans are usually between 14 to 15 year old sizing. It's completely normal.

So yeah.....if you are European and you're trynna shop in Asian clothing stores, you need to check the sizing coz women sizes are a whole lot smaller than European ones.....I can't fit EU sizing....they are always too big for me.....

I gave a talk at my kids' school the other day

 I wasn't super prepared. I think it's coz I've never given talks or lectures to kids. I used to lecture diploma students and working people. This was definitely a whole different level of talk. At first, I was under the impression that I was gonna be speaking to kids between the ages of 13 to 17 years old. And then, I discovered that I was gonna be talking to kids between the ages of 7 to 12 years old. So.....I had to change my game.....quick.

You bet, Pokemon, hobbies, Roblox and Minecraft were all included into the talk. Fishing and football and rugby and archery and horseback riding too. Their attention level is different. I knew I had to interact with them more instead of just giving out points. So yeah.......I made a lot of new friends by the time my talk ended. Being friends with kids is kinda typical of me coz I can't relate to adults much and I am always babysitting anyways.

My daughters friends consider me their friend and we're always creating stickers and designing and writing silly songs together. Now, I have friends who talks about fishing and football and rugby. It was fun to have them reminded of staying safe online and irl. I really like the fact that these kids are doing things outside of their homes. 

I also met Yusuf's friends. They came up to me to chat. It was really nice to finally meet them in person instead of just hearing stories about them from Yusuf. I hope we become friends coz I am aware of how small the community is and I always think it's everyone's responsibility to look out for the kids in the kampung regardless if it's our kampung or the neighbouring ones. 

AnimeFest 2026 Sunway Pyramid

 So....we took a quick trip over to Sunway Pyramid.....coz of Anime Fest.....

I was NOT prepared. I was at Hoyo Fest with Yusuf and this time, Safiyya and Ali Imran wanted to come along so Shu got Yusuf and I 2-day passes while he and the other 2 babies got the one day passes. Yusuf and Safiyya are shopaholics. They could spend shitloads at an event like this and we'd end up with so much stuff.

Yusuf and I skipped breakfast on the morning of the first day thinking we were gonna be late. When we got there, there was already a line. A LONG ASS FREAKIN LINE. But, we were behind a blue haired girl who was not in full costume yet at the time. I spotted a guy in a Ghostbusters costume with an awesome looking Proton Pack on his back. I thought he was gonna get in line but he took a turn before we got to the end of the line so we continued lining up. 

Once the event started, the line moved pretty quickly. The first day was always the walkthrough day. The first floor was where the main convention center and stage was. There were lots of big names like Medialink, and Cheetah and OH! Gatcha and Not Only Toy. But the artist alley was always the fun bit. Not so fun on the pocket but very very fun to walk around. Especially when you get to meet the artists themselves.

Well, I got myself a super huge Death Eater hoodie from Cheetah coz......I wanted it even though it was super huge on me. As soon as I put on my black cat ears, it looked like ME ^_^

Anywho, Yusuf spent so much money and there were so many kids dressed as Umamusume characters. Again, just like Genshin Impact and Honkai Starail......I don't play Umamusume either but I am aware of the art style and characters. I met so many other cosplayers as well, Hollow Knight, Master Roshi, Genshin and Honkai characters, Ultraman.....Taro and Zero, I think.....they were walking....Zoey from K-Pop Demon Hunters, Yor from Spy X Family,Shinobu Kocho,Satoru Gojo.....well...there were also Marvel and DC cosplayers too......again, I could only spot and take pictures with so many of them.....

ALL OF THEM were dressed so FREAKIN NICELY! I got myself art prints and books on the second day. From Dave Fuse Imaginarium, JTLKLM,METEORALL......Minykelly, Wei Li Wonka....omg......I can't remember ALL of the booths that we shopped at....I got some Gundam arts too.....It was fun. It's been a while since I went to these conventions.

I might go again for more conventions throughout the year......we'll see ^_^

P.S. : We also did some shopping at the mall...... 😁

Women From The Generation Of Delulu 😂

 

there are a lot of things in this world that i disagree with....

 ...there are also a lot of things that I agree with.....

Not that my opinion or POV matters coz I am just a rando in the system. I am aware that just like everyone else, I too am collateral. 

I just sometimes wish that things were more efficient. In many ways. But there is corruption. I the system. In humans. Human error. Shit like that.

I grew up in a household that made me believe that women were constantly being oppressed and that we need to "equip" ourselves before getting into shit like relationship and stuff. None of those were ever true. I was stuck with some women who are just fucked up. They have their own problems and weren't able to compartmentalize it and throws their shit around. 

Well, an example of it all is how they think we should have a "relationship" the moment we get into secondary school. It wasn't an idea that sat well with me. I had shit to deal with. Puberty. Hormones. Grades. Getting a boyfriend was definitely NOT on my priority list. Also, I was never a people person. I like my own time. I like doing things on my own without having to confirm or reconfirm with other people who can't keep track of time.

And then, I was told that as women, we had to "prepare" certain things before marriage. I am not talking about physical appearances. It was more on like the financial aspect of things. And then, the same people who kept pestering me about all this shit on having a job and securing finances weren't even working to begin with. Then, I began to wonder why the hell was I constantly being pushed to work and earn when my husband said it was fine if I didn't wanna work coz we're good.

So, there's the whole "you have to work and contribute to your family" bullshit alongside the whole "you gotta take care and raise your kids coz you're a woman" bullshit. I do not oppose either of these ideas. I just think it is strange coming from someone who never worked and constantly pushing me to work and then, they'd ask for money from me.....and....the fact that I don't have a problem with my husband and they seem to have a problem with it.....

It's very confusing but this is the shit I keep having to explain and re-explain everytime someone brings up the whole "why are you not in contact with your family". I have shit normal people don't deal with and I have a POV unlike the taboo. 

This is has a lot more to it....especially now that Yusuf is old enough to want to know and understand a lot of things, our conversations are usually very honest but very uncommon to the society. He understands it and he was asking why I was treated as such when I was growing up. 

*sigh* 

I always wanna keep it a 100 with my kids coz I grew up in a household where shit was constantly getting swept under the rug when trying to keep up with the Joneses.  

Do you ever wanted to do a million and one things all at once?

 And then, you don't have enough time in a day or enough energy in a day to do it all.....That's kinda me right now. I am constantly thinking about new things and new ways and new whatever to create or write or make. It's driving me crazy. I need sleep. And I am not getting enough of it. It's not healthy and I finally got my ass to a hair salon today to get a haircut after almost 2 years of not cutting my hair. I was just....not giving myself the time to get a haircut. 

Also, I tried out this hairspa thingy the other day. I need to commit to getting it done at least once a month. It's not like that Balinese spa I love so much in Cyberjaya but it's hair treatment and relaxation. I miss it. And today, the hair stylist pointed out that I haven't been there in a long while and that I need to get some vitamins added into my daily routine to keep my hair and scalp healthy. Good idea. I'll do that if I can remember to do it when I get around to doing it.

At the back of my mind right now is.....should I get a costume for the upcoming cosplay event I am going with the kids or should I just show up as myself? I found a shop that sells cosplay contact lenses and I LURVE them all!!! But.....I can't just show up with contacts with no context.....right? I had always loved Enma Ai but......I don't think I have enough time to come up with a costume......

Damn!

Selamat Hari Raya.....

 It's late...I know.....but it's been one helluva ride....

The last 10 days of Ramadan had been super hectic. Yusuf had a lot of school activities and I hardly slept like a normal human being. Every Ramadan, I would be the human alarm for everyone to wake up for sahur and this year, we did not miss a single day of sahur. In fact, there are nights when I didn't even sleep at all coz my human clock had practically messed up completely.

For some strange reason, I was awake on Eid itself and followed through the entire day's events without falling asleep. Maybe it was coz we were all at that villa by the beach and I spent most of my alone time walking along the beach......regardless the time of the day,in my kebaya.....yeah....it was my therapy coz I miss the ocean.....

I need to get my ass back into the sea soon......

often times, I'd lose faith in humanity.....

 Like why things are happening and why we are ignoring certain matters......it does bring me down. I am not immune to it all. I just......feel helpless....

And then, something would happen.....maybe not to me,but to someone I don't know personally....and then, people come together to help.....and then, I'd find my faith in humanity once again. It's not about who you are or what you have, it's the things you do, things you can do......for others.....

Yusuf is growing up and we'd have a lot of chats about social interactions and how we'd go about it. I always tell him how it's been with me growing up. I never try to be someone I'm not. Not when it comes to my kids. I tell them how it is. So now, he understands why I am like this and why I do what I do and why my upbringing was different from Shu's.

I would always remind our kids to always lookout for one another which includes their friends and schoolmates. Especially kids coz they don't know any better and if the adults don't help them, no one would.

Shu said he was watching a movie about this couple.....

 The baseline was that the girl left the guy coz she said he's poor but that was not the real reason. He was constantly whining and not doing anything about it. So Shu said, that is the problem he has with people today. They want everything but they just whine and rant and complain about it but not actually doing anything about it. My stand is clear. I usually ghost people who refuse to help themselves. I feel like it's a waste of my time and energy trying to help someone whose only goal is to rant and complain but not doing anything to change their situation.

Life is not easy. Nothing is. But if you just go on and on about how someone else should spend their money or time that has nothing to do with you,you should probably change something in your life and make that shift. I was once told about it's better to teach a man to fish rather than giving him fish. Well, that's exactly what I do now. I won't give you just coz. If people can hustle and do multiple jobs at once trying to make a better living, so can you.

And the whole social situation about girls saying "I will only marry rich guys" is getting out of control. I can only say, good luck with that. Coz these days, the guys are also looking to marry rich girls only. So.....yeah.....there it goes.....my last flying fuck.....Hahahaha......There is no more hope in humanity 😂

it's official!

 Designated Chaos has finally joined Spotify and YouTube Music and ETC.....

Designated Chaos Spotify

To think that 2026 started with us getting sick......and then the flight delays......and the horrible accident (thanks to my clumsiness) I scraped my arm on a door hinge which sucked coz it hurt like hell......and then....I got assaulted by my own feathered pillow -_- sometimes I wonder if I am actually living a life based on someone's writing on what they think is fuhney......

But then, someone commented on our YouTube channel,saying that we should get our music onto Spotify.....so we did......

hola 2026!

 I'm late coz I haven't been at home.....also.....I've been moving around too much.....eventhough I have all of my shit with me (laptop,iPad,phones,watercolor) I still haven't had the time to do anything much. We were doing way too much shopping. WAY. TOO. MUCH. Shu wanted to take us to Lalaport in KL......I found the Gundam I wanted......so....I bought it.....it's a huge ass box and I have been lugging it around everywhere....and then.....we were in Berjaya Time Square......there was an XL-Toy shop there.....I found a figure I had been looking for.....it wasn't listed on their site.....so I got it.....and then....oh yeah, we were at IOI mall,the New Year's Eve Astro concert was held there....even though we never went for the actual concert, we got to see Alley Cats doing a sound check which was AWESOME!!!!Daymn! They sound good.....

Anywho, managed to use the tub one night and I accidentally forgot to put in a little more cold water into the tub so I uh.....burnt myself 😑 Um.....yeah....Shu booked me a spa sesh and it was pretty good.....I've always like Balinese massages. I've been distracted....too distracted....

The Bambu Lab A1 Mini arrived a few weeks ago. I've been 3D printing shit...getting used to STL files and stuff....learning threshold supports....stuff....Shu got me 400 bux worth of filament and I made quite a lot of things......I've been loving my Sakura Koi watercolor paint set so much that I have been painting a lot on the go. It really is nice to be able to paint again. 

At this point, we are already used to airport security checks that everything is planned ahead. If I am gonna be out of town for more than 3 days, I would usually bring along my laptop so....the security checks is a bit messy coz I have to take my laptop out....but at this point, I usually take everything like my phones and watch and put it into my backpack and I would take out my laptop and iPad out before getting scanned. The process is quick. 

Now, I am currently at the lounge coz our flight had been delayed from 3pm to 8:30pm. YEAAAAAAAAAAAH........I took out all of my shit and starting camping out here 😶‍🌫️