I am still in love with this song ❤️

For a while I thought I fell asleep
Lying motionless inside a dream
Then rising suddenly I felt a chilly breath upon me
She softly whispered in my ear

Forsaken, I have come for you tonight
Awaken, look in my eyes
And take my hand
Give yourself up to me

I waited painfully for not to fall again
Trying to silence the fear within me
Out of the night and mist I felt a stinging kiss
And saw a crimson sting on her lips

I have to know your name
Where have I seen
Your face before?
My dear, why don't you be afraid?

Forsaken, I have come for you tonight
Awaken, look in my eyes
And take my hand
Give yourself up to me

Take me far away
Close your eyes
And hold your breath
'Til the ends of the earth

Forsaken, I have come for you tonight
Awaken, look in my eyes and take my hand

Forsaken, fly away with me tonight
Awaken, renew my life
Now you are mine
Give yourself up to me

FidZy against The World : Episode 1

Here's a little background about me and what I used to do. I used to teach diploma students English (in preparation for MUET). I know,VERY NERDY of me. I have nothing against the students. I have major issues with the system.

For many years now since I quit my job (including lecturing), my mum had been trying to get me back to teaching English. She'd send me job openings about universities wanting English teachers. She'd also push me to doing my masters so that I can teach Bachelors Degree programs.

To be honest,I have been holding back on doing my masters coz I am just having way too much fun doing things I like. I have the materials for my research already. Not sure if they are still relevant but if I could just sit and take the time to write a damn thesis,I'd have my masters degree in no time. Ok, I am just not in the mood for it now.

But back to the job opening, I have a problem getting into a system whereby you as a teacher has the mindset of kids with bad English come from certain areas. English is NOT their first language. It's not most of our first language. In case they haven't realized, kids grow up in households speaking languages like Malay, Hokkien,Cantonese,Mandarin,Tamil,Urdhu and so on........

What I'm getting at is that back in uni,we had to do Arabic as a graduating requirement. Our lecturers were well aware that most of us do NOT speak Arabic at home. They don't come into class with a certain mindset that discriminates non-Arabic speaking students from those who are already fluent Arabic speakers. In fact,the Arabic speaking kids are more than open to help us learn Arabic and pass our papers. If we lack the basics,they'd tell us to do the right thing by quitting that class that semester to not ruin our scores and help us work on the basics before attempting a class.

Similarly, you cannot set an expectation towards students especially if they are not even speaking English as a first language. Some of us grew up speaking English and we had a whole lot of practice and exposure to the language. You can't expect these kids to pass an exam within a short period of time and then penalize them and label them as though they are bad students. It's a language class. You as the educator need to get with the damn program!

HELP THEM!

I was thrown into teaching a class with absolutely zero teaching training and capabilities. I had a syllabus guide and some materials to work with. Out of my own effort, I gauged the kids by having them write out an open topic essay just to see what exactly I was dealing with. All I can say is that these kids needed help and more time to get their basics straight before attempting the test.

Here's what I intend to do. I'm gonna teach basic English for pre-university students as well as anyone who needs help getting the basics of English FOR FREE. I also have experience in teaching English to working people while I was working with them. I'd totally teach FOR FREE.

Redang Island snorkeling trip

Yusuf is big enough to go snorkeling in the deep sea but Ali Imran and Safiyya are still too little to snorkel so that meant that following the activity schedule by the hotel would be a hassle.

Shu decided to charter a boat that would take just the 5 of us. This also meant that we could leave at anytime we wanted and not wait for anyone else.

Safiyya enjoyed the speedboat trip. Ali Imran enjoyed feeding the fish. Yusuf had a blast snorkeling. We even got to swim with the turtles. I touched them and they were so friendly.

I miss these songs from her

We spent an entire week in Laguna Redang Island Resort

I am emotionally drained. I cannot explain this. Not yet.

However, since our 10th year wedding anniversary was in June and that traveling was still up in the air after the MCO, Shu decided to push our anniversary vacation to July.

Here's how it all began. A week before the trip, I was on this pill coz....... Well, I can't explain exactly what it's for. But it basically messed up my entire hormonal system.

Anywho, that led to a point in my mind that I was not in good shape. Physically. Eventually, it pushed me to over work my workout routine and limit what I was eating.....which was already minimal at the time anyways.

That led me to a horrible eating disorder. On Sunday, we were on our way to the East coast to stay over at a hotel on the mainland before catching a ferry to the island the next morning.

Something went wrong and I spent the entire evening throwing up. The next day, I forced some food into my system just so that I could get my shit together and not throw up on the boat.

We eventually made it to the jetty and boarded the boat. The whole SOP thingy is still a bit weird and confusing for me. We wore our masks. I am The queen of overpacking and decided to bring 2 guitars coz I didn't like busking alone.

Along the lines of overpacking, I also managed to make some horrible decisions in not packing enough t shirts to go with shorts I brought. The dresses I decided to bring needed specific inner wear which I also did not check or bring. This terrible packing was done by me over the course of 3 days before the trip.

I know...... I'm an idiot!

We got to the island and discovered that due to the whole social Distancing thingy, we had no way of getting a ride to the reception lobby so we went on foot. The weather was a bit cloudy that day.

At this point, we realized that we are familiar to the hotel staff already coz we were just here in March.

We got to our room and changed and had lunch and then headed to the beach. We managed to get some sun over the next couple of days. OK, we got a whole lot of sun. I totally dig it. I was looking so pale that all my bruises and cuts from all of my clumsiness were showing.

Speaking of clumsy, I successfully managed to bump my shin on the bottom part of the door while exiting the boat. Way to go, FidZy! This bump stayed on for a few days and everytime I tried to get lotion onto my legs, it would hurt.

Alongside that, I also got some serious bug bites which caused some swelling and bruising. I kept telling myself not to scratch or it would bleed. Yey!

Our room was facing out to the sea which was nice. Busking out on the balcony was awesome. For a while I thought I was having some tuning and pitching issues. I am so used to the resonance from jamming in our studio space back at home that playing outside threw me off the course. We persevered anyways.

We had a great time but for some reason I could tell that the staff were undergoing some stress issues. I think it's cause by the whole SOP. Either ways, I think they were great. They could use a hug too.

Daydreamer AURORA

White, silicon eyes, watching storms, sitting quiet
Reading books in the heat of city lights
Bored, everyone's bored
When I'm restless, put me under the night life stars
And I will feel grounded

I know I'm just a girl
But can I change lives?
If I am nothing, if I am trying, I think I can
I step on broken glass, and dream of soft clouds
When feelings are heavy they become all we are

And we become night time dreamers
And street walkers, small talkers
When we should be daydreamers
And moonwalkers and dream talkers
And we become night time dreamers
Street walkers, small talkers
When we should be daydreamers
And moonwalkers and dream talkers
In real life

The quiet lust belongs to all of us
And drives us closer into the madness
Of the world, of a girl
(And it suits me just fine)
'Cause everyone dies, and nobody loves
And somebody dies right now
I hear the quiet, sweet music that no one sings

And we become night time dreamers
Street walkers and small talkers
When we should be daydreamers
And moonwalkers and dream talkers
And we become night time dreamers
Street walkers, small talkers
When we should be daydreamers
And moonwalkers and dream talkers
In real life

All I ever know is what I dream about when I'm sober
Never turn away from love
Before the love, you have me sober
All I ever know is what I dream about when I'm sober
Never turn away from love
Before the love, you have me sober
Nothing can die while we are here
Nothing can die while we are here
Nothing can die while we are here
Nothing can die while we are here

Then we become night time dreamers
Street walkers and small talkers
When we should be daydreamers
And moonwalkers and dream talkers
And we become night time dreamers
Street walkers, small talkers

When we should be daydreamers
(Nothing can die while we are here)
When we should be daydreamers
(Nothing can die while, nothing can die)

Apple Tree by AURORA

I prefer the sound of you when you are away

Some people just are not worth being around. I can only take so much of these kinds of people. I call them "Holier  Than Thou". I'm not against religion. I'm against people who speak about religion with prejudgment towards you. They speak to you like they are better without knowing the truth about what's really going on. I have often thought these kinds of mentality is dead. Boy was I wrong. It's one thing to have an opinion about someone but if it's someone you don't even know, I'd say keep your thoughts to yourself. Especially if all you have to say about that person is negative.

I have been training myself to keep my mouth and comments and opinions to myself especially if I have nothing nice or helpful or productive to say. It's been going well. It makes it seem like I don't know anything or don't know much but I find that being opinionated just isn't worth it. At least not all the time. I also believe that every individual have their own interests and that as long as it does not involve injuring or harming anything or anyone else, I'd say " You do you,boo!"

I do have problems when you have decided to live your lives a certain way because you CHOSE to live it that way and no one else told you to do it but then,you feel the need to impose this "lifestyle" of yours onto others. It especially annoys me when you decide to make financial decisions for other people and make it sound as though if they don't follow this direction, they will be.......well,condemned in the eyes of the religion..........and it actually does not.........

These are the same types of people who starts protests about animal rights but at the end of the day does not take in the animals under their custody themselves. Erm, I believe in animal rights but not when I cannot provide a solution to the existing problem. It really isn't helping at all.

Anyways, I cannot be around people who think that being on the "path of righteousness" means you cannot have fun and laugh and just have a good time. I'm a hedonist........at least that's what my dad says. I most probably am. I'm a laid back and jam with my guitar and have good company and good coffee type of person. I'd love me a good round of live music. I also like certain things that money can buy because I am human. I also enjoy helping other people whenever I can,however I can and not make a big fuss about it. It's just not helpful. 

It's been updated!

Not my phone. My new song. I have recently come across some breakthrough and managed to change it and quite honestly,with some rearranging in the lyrics,I should be quite done with it ^_^

I just needed to be in the right head space. I've been bothered by something and I haven't been able to channel out my thoughts. Most of the time,writing and jamming does the job but this time,it took me a few days. I'm good now.

I am excited and nervous at the same time but this time,it's all quite visible. Everything used to be blurry coz I wasn't able to see pass the next one week. Still, our packages are yet to come. I have no idea WTF is going on anymore. Maybe it's coz the borders were closed off so much before. It's still is and we should keep it this way until.......well,until we are absolutely sure........

Fun fact, I was talking to a doctor some months ago while getting my blood sample,she told me that the HFM disease still does not have a vaccine coz no one is funding the research.

Shu picked a song on our drive home from dinner last night

It was Livin' On A Prayer by Bon Jovi. I sang it out loud without butchering the verses. It was epic!

So, we moved

We finally moved. It's not completely over coz some of our stuff are still in the old house. But most of our things are with us at the new place.

Mr Js inc

Some plant babies 

Most of our guitar babies 

Testing the acoustics of our new lepak area

A Different Kind Of Human

Are you awake or are you sleeping?
Are you afraid? We've been waiting for this meeting
Oh, Superman, are you with me when I am too weak?
Oh, Mother, are you dreaming of me in your sleep?

We have come here for you, and we're coming in peace
Mothership will take you on higher, higher
This world you live in is not a place for someone like you
Come on, let us take you home

It's time to go, you are infected
Come as you are, don't be scared of us, you'll be protected
(Protected, protected)
I guess you are a different kind of human
I guess you are a different kind of human

We have come here for you, and we're coming in peace
Mothership will take you on higher, higher
This world you live in is not a place for someone like you
Come on, let us take you home

Omega hai foleet, Omega hai foleet
Omega toneca, Omega for let in
Omega hai foleet, Omega hai foleet
Omega toneca, Omega for let in

There is a flaw in man-made matters
But you are pure, and we have to get you out of here

We have come here for you, and we're coming in peace
Mothership will take you on higher, higher
This world you live is not a place for someone like you
Come on let us take you home
We have come here for you, and we're coming in peace
Mothership will take you on higher, higher
This world you live is not a place for someone like you
Come on, let us take you home

Omega hai foleet, Omega hai foleet
Omega toneca, Omega for let in
Omega hai foleet, Omega hai foleet
Omega toneca, Omega for let in

Hello? Hello?
Hello? Hello?
Is anyone out there?
Am I home? Am I home?

Bloopers

Intoxicated was a band I used to listen to when I was in school

This song was my favorite track from them

10 years ago today, Shu and I got married

The world is hating on each other. It saddens me.

I hope love will come to us again-AURORA

Boboiboy Galaxy theme song featuring Yusuf and Safiyya

Since there is nothing much to do

Shu decided to record a video of me covering a Hanson song

I introduced Shu to this band and now he won't stop listening to this song

I love this song. This song and Our Farewell........

Of course,they have heavier songs but I discovered this band back when I was a freshman in college from one of those compilation celtic music CDs.

They sound exactly the way they did back then